Pastor Jonathan was once a pastor in Gospel Faith Mission, and he was once a fervent, rugged and dependable trustworthy man of God, who knows what he’s doing, he preaches the message of salvation and live his life by it in eternity in view, before he got married, he was a celebrated drunkard.

One day, Yetunde went out for evangelism and she found Jonathan on her way and preached to him, after her preaching, Jonathan broke down and became born-again, Yetunde led him to her church and he was doing well in the Lord. As times goes on the grace of God located him for pulpit ministration, he went to bible school and graduated excellently and began to do well in the ministry.

As time went on, the Lord told Jonathan that the lady (Yetunde) who was the instrumental to his salvation is his wife, mean while as the Lord was ministering to Jonathan he has as well ministered to Yetunde. They got married and they have children and they were both living their life very well for the lord. But one day, the devil sow a seed of dis-unity into their midst, by shooting an arrow of disobedient and lack of submission into the life of Yetunde against her husband, to the extent that whenever Pastor Jonathan want to have an affair with her wife she will refused him, this she continue doing for 3 good years.

Within these 3 years, pastor Jonathan will come to Yetunde his wife without covering his shame, saying I am busy working for the Lord but I’m still guilty, because I’m beginning to lust after ladies now. You are killing me silently and you know I’m not an angel, and you also know how often I counsel women everyday as the nature of my job, my wife please have mercy and stop doing these, but Yetunde will shout on him and say leave me alone and stop disturbing me. how can you call yourself a man of God and can’t control yourself? You’d better pray and fast and let God take away your sexual urges; it’s not food, so why should you backslide because of sex?

Three years after, Pastor Jonathan couldn’t hold it anymore and end up impregnating a lady in the church, who has being seducing him for a very long time
Later the secrete became exposed, Yetunde was very angry that her husband could do this to her, she was praying and weeping, abusing her husband that he has brought shame upon her, but pastor Jonathan didn’t offer a word to her. The church committee summons pastor Jonathan and place him on suspension and he was excommunicated for a very long duration. 

During this period of his excommunication, he will be the first to get to the church and he will sit at the back of the church, no one will talk to him nor greet him, and he will also be the last to leave the church. No one will visit him at home or give him a gift.
He endures this shame and punishment, waiting until the duration of his excommunication. On the day of his restoration back to the church, he went down with his Bible and his sermon note book, the church elders and committee rebuked him and said, we never expect such from someone like you because you are highly respected among other pastors, as they were saying these, pastor Jonathan knelt down in front of the church committee and later prostrated and apologize for his deeds.

His wife also took up a microphone and apologies in front of the whole congregation telling the church to forgive her husband, When the church committee saw his humility and seriousness in repenting, they said to him, we love you and we forgive you, you are now welcome back into our midst as a pastor. 
Then pastor Jonathan speaks out and said No. There is no need for that again, I am not willing to continue in the journey anymore, just permit me to say something to this woman (Yetunde) he said, I call her this woman because she is no longer my wife.

Pastor Jonathan turned to his wife and said, woman I thank God for your life, it was you God use to save my life and I also want to thank God again because it’s the same you the devil used to take away my salvation, so please take this bible and my sermon note book from me. You are free to continue your heavenly journey while I will change my direction back from here. But when you see your master Jesus on the final day, he will ask you about me. As soon as he finish saying this, he walked out of the church, and went straight back to the beer pallor where he was many years ago before Yetunde converted him. The whole church were shocked and many shed tears for him, they tried all they can to restored him back but the man has made up his mind. (Let’s stop here) 
If you ever have a blood of any sinner on your hand, perhaps he/she backslides because of your evil attitude, there is no how you can do it, you will surely end up in hell or else you restored him/her back
Kumuyi said and I quote “If you send your spouse to hell fire, how then can a Just God suddenly becomes unjust to take you to heaven? “ 
Of a truth, Yetunde may still remain in the faith, but there is no how she can ever make it to heaven except she restored back the man she pushed out of the faith. If you have the blood stain of any sinner on you, you can never make it to heaven, if this be the case, she will have to prayed and fast for his restoration else her eternity is at stake 
Women are to be careful, don’t kill a soul you cannot save. No matter the height or the knowledge acquired by anybody in the lord, he still needs constant support of the grace of God. don’t say I trust my husband he is a pastor, he can’t do such, forgotten that you married to a human and not an Angel, even if you’ve prayed very well before choosing your spouse it doesn’t mean that marriage can’t lead you to hell if it’s not well managed. Many people married the will of God and yet they never enjoy the marriage while many end up in hell. satan doesn’t believe there is someone too hard for him to pull down, he has gotten many down through marriages and every day the rate of divorcing increases most especially among Christians family 
Once a man is legally married, he has every right to have an affair with his wife anytime of the day. Bible seriously warned us never to deprive ourselves from each others, One of the reason why God institute marriages is to avoid adultery or fornication, but many people never knew it’s a sin to deny their spouse of sex, it would have being better to remain unmarried rather than marrying the man and keeping him in bondage. This is seriously going on many Christians family home, many ladies say they were very zeal for God, but neglect their marital duty, they deny their body from their husband in the name of 70days MFM fasting and 100days RCCG fasting, they denied their husband in name of program, conference and church activities, of a true you are seriously working for God but you are still guilty. 
Satan has seriously focuses his battle field in the area of marriage most especially Christians home, believe it or not, many home broken today are 70% Christians home, because God said, this is the woman I’m giving you as your wife doesn’t mean Satan will not try his best to destroy the marriage, many of them that even have the will of God are now divorce today. Many home that should have being a happy home are crying bitterly, 
Can God make mistake? Never, God who said it is not good to be alone knew you need a woman to live a prosperous life, he never instituted marriage for the destruction of man, but many Christians who were burning in hell today, would have made it up to heaven if they have remain single, because God chose a particular lady or man for you doesn’t mean you have to neglect your role as a husband or as wife, when man slept, his enemies come to sow a seed of destruction.

When you are not watchful, your marriage will makes you lost your eternity. don’t depend on yourself that you are a strong Christians, you can pray and fast, satan is never afraid of your prayers or fasting if you neglect your role as a husband or as a wife, many Christians goes to court day by day to divorce their spouse, believe it or not, if you are a divorcee who has divorce his or her spouse, there is no how you can do it, you will never make it to heaven, because God said in Mal2:16 I HATE DIVORCE
I have warned many people, do not because of your age says you want to get married, marriage is not about age, it’s not about wealth, it’s not about what you have, but it has to do with maturity and a lot of patient, if you lack this two, you will suffer in your marriage. You can be a pastor and yet not matured for marriage just like sister Yetunde,
Once a woman has started denying herself from her husband, Christian family or not, she has already started digging the grave of her own marriage, because you have just given the devil a loophole to penetrate through, that is what the devil has being longing for, as times goes on there will be gap in-between the husband and the wife, as times goes on he’ll begin to lust in his heart after some other women and the moment a man start to lust after a woman in his hearth because he was being denied of sex, already he’s an adulterer and the marriage bed will be defiled, and the glory of the marriage will begin to die gradually.

Woman listen, to this, your husband have every right to come to you any time and you must be ready to give to him whenever he requested for it except you both agree to deny yourself to seek the face of God. This is the mistake many women are doing, they deny themselves for months, and even years in the name of I’m serving the Lord. Believe it or not, if your serving the Lord is affecting your spouse, you are only working in vain, you may be very busy for God but if you have failed in the area of marriage, you will surely fail in the area of ministry because your first ministry is your marriage. Bible said in Prov14:1 a wise woman builds her own house, not a wise man built his own house. Of a true the husband is the head of the house but the bible never recognize the husband to be the owner of the house but the woman.

Many Christians woman eventually lost their husband into the hand of Haggai because they are too busy for the lord. I’ve read the book of Mary K. Baxter whereby an evangelist lost her husband into the hand of a strange woman as a result of that she developed hatred and killed both the woman, the husband and herself and she end up in hell. You must serve the Lord, but you must never allow it to hinder your duty in the marriage, haven’t you read the story of the virtues woman in proverb31? don’t misquote Luke14:26 by saying if I don’t hate my husband for the sake of Christ, I will not make it to heaven, if you are rude to your husband you have hate Christ Automatically and you will end in hell if you neglect your duty as a wife in name of ministry, When you know you really want to serve the Lord, why didn’t you remain unmarried?

We all must serve the Lord, that’s why we are here on earth, but you must do it in a ways whereby you will not be guilty in your marriage and also will not be guilty in your given divine assignment. This is why Apostle Paul said it, if you are married you will be entangled with many thing rather than serving the Lord and you have read this times without number, and you insisted in marrying, once you marry as a wife then all your decision will be determined by your husband. You wanted to embark on 100days fasting, have you seek approval from your husband that you will deny him of sex for 100days? It is very easy for woman to deny themselves from sex for years but it’s not so for the man, the question is have you seek for permission or you just deny your body?

Many women has lost their husband into the hand of strange women because of this, this is the reason why you need wisdom, you can’t be a fool and please God, what you are nourishing and denying your husband of, many ladies outside are ready to give it to him willingly because they are homes destroyers, they are even much in the church, don’t let church activities hindered you of your marital duity as a wife, your work can’t get you to heaven, but can only earn you reward in heaven, you can be pointing soul to heaven while you yourself can be on your way to hell because of your negligence, many men now spend their time masturbating because they were being denied of sex by their wife, you need to be wise, the bible said let he that lack understanding ask the Lord.

As a woman, you must submit to your husband in every way that is the reason why you must never marry an unbeliever. If the Above pastor Jonathan can fall because his wife deny him of sex for years, then what about that man of yours who is not even a pastor and yet you are pushing him outside? God will judge you for that except you repent.Many were full of pride because they are richer than their husband, if you find it difficult to allow your husband to be the controller of even the money you have, you can never become a daughter of Zion.

Many women will say me I’m humble I will submit to my husband, these are fantasy words, when money comes into your hand your real spirit will shows up in you, if you are a woman because you are earning more than your husband and because of that you spend on expensive clothes, shoes, phones cars while your husband is just managing the little Jackie salary he’s earning, even with that he will still pay for the necessary bill and you are lavishing money on yourself, then you are a demon possessed and you are the mountain standing against the man upliftment, you have failed as a helper and you will end up in hell, do you think heaven is just what you can think in your own imagination? Heaven is more than that and you can’t get there.

You are call to be a helper and a supporter, even those salaries of yours that want to destroy your marriage should be decided by your husband on how to spend it. Don’t you understand what the bible called submission? You are just a rib of a man and it is impossible for the rib to dictate to the whole body, it’s wrong, Bible said wife submit to your own husband as unto the Lord. How do you do that ? Paul said in Gal2:20 I am crucified with Christ: nevertheless I live; yet not I, but Christ liveth in me: and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by the faith of the Son of God, who loved me, and gave himself for me. The moment you are married, all your decision must be taken by your husband, if you can’t do it you have failed as a wife because without humility you can’t get to heaven
Another way to destroys your home is dirtiness, if you as a woman, you can’t eat in your toilet,, then it means you are dirty. some men prefer to go alone on a trip rather than going with their wife, some women dress as if they are suffering and they looks older than their age, you are pushing your husband outside, if he’s an unbeliever you will surely lost him.  Dirtiness drives in evil spirit, and houses filled with evil spirit can’t belongs to the devil. If you enter some people houses everywhere will be stinking with children urine, you can’t even go to their kitchen not to talk of their toilet, when they go outside they put on just any cloth saying I’m a married woman no one is looking at me, you will disgrace your husband.
Another way of digging a pit for your marriage is lack of respect among women. This usually occurred among the ministers wife, most of the time some pastors wife will just go to the pulpit and announce that there will be women program this week even without informing their husband who is the head of the church, the pastor is making announcement and the woman too is making announcement and only on the pulpit that the man will be hearing the coming event of the woman, this is a serious spirit of Jezebel, many women lacks respect, they gives no regards to their husband all in the name they are now being called pastor Mrs. You must repent of all these, pride goes first before destruction.

Many woman can’t kneel for their husband while some takes decision without informing their husband, always claiming equal right with the husband. The man will say this is what should be done and they will be telling the man I can’t do it that way, but my own way. if you are a woman who always nag and argue with your husband, he can’t love you, he will prefare to spend the whole days outside with his friend rather than staying with you at home because Prov21:19 says “it is better to dwell in the wilderness, than with a contentious and an angry woman” I’ve seen many women cursing their husband and shouting on them, in fact some keep malice. These is pure demonic, you can’t get to heaven these way

Many women don’t know what they have until they lose it. that man you are looking as nobody, and you are maltreating, some women wish he could be their husband, you are comparing the present situation of your husband with some men outside, calling him fools saying you regret you married him, remember God said to Israelite, what you speak in my ear I will do, very soon your word will come to pass, and that man you regret he’s your husband will be snatched away from you by a strange women, many women wish to have that man, when I’m talking of women I mean high class women who are ready to lavish money on him, but because of his faithfulness to his marriage vow and the fear of God in him, he will never do that and yet you are pushing him outside through your attitude, you will end up in hell, many men abandoned their family to run after a strange women but most of these were caused by the troublesome women. Your husband married you because he loves you, but once you start trampling on that love with your foot you will regret of his next action. Keep saying my husband is a pastor he can’t do that, I will advise you to wake up from your dream because you haven’t married an Angel

Many women became wicked towards their husband because he doesn’t have much, they called him all kind of insultive name because he’s a man of God, many men wish to remain outside and not come home until it’s late. Many men whom you see to always spend much of their time in the office rather than staying at home with their wife, it’s because of what they are passing thorough at home, some women lacks home training, they can rubbish their husband shout on him just because he’s a man of God and he will not say a word, you will perish in hell except you repent, they speaks rudely towards their husband and makes their husband ever regret marrying a wife, prov5:18 says, rejoice with the wife of thy youth, but how can he rejoice with a devil under the same roof? The bible never said you should marry the man and drain him, but God said you should support him, have you ever go on your kneel to pray for his upliftment?

All you do is complaint and abusive word, you can’t curse your husband and expect him to prosper, and if he remain under the bondage of your early morning cursing, you will never enjoy the marriage either. Don’t tell him he brought you in to make you suffer, when you already know he doesn’t have much, learn to manage and endure. I heard of a woman telling her husband that I can’t eat lump in the morning, my parent don’t teach me that, why do you marry and not remain with your parent? You know this man doesn’t have much why don’t you manage with him?

Some women use starvation to punish their husband whenever they demand something from them and didn’t see it, they will begin to keep malice with their husband, they will not cook their food, nor wash their cloths, many men are so discipline that they will never eat outside, no matter how they could be hungry, they will endure to go home and eat, and that is exactly what the woman uses as an advantage against them to starve them as a punishment, many of them will go to kitchen themselves and be boiling indomie because their wife has refused to cook for them, as times goes on the man will be the one begging their wife even if they aren’t guilty, and these women will think they are on top of the world.
I’ve heard of a pastor wife shouting at their husband, many of these so called men of God whom you see outside are just pretenders, they are only pretending to be happy but they are going through fire at home, that is the reason why you see pastor wife mounting the pulpit to announce women program without informing their husband, she will announce women meeting without informing their husband who is the pastor, they are many. I will advice you Christian women, I no longer buy the idea of women fellowship again because most women are being initiated with the spirit of Jezebel and Leviathan, how can a woman who does not give reverence to her husband at home be a Christians women leader, what does she have to offer? You will see them shouting at their husband and arguing with them
Many always cut short of their husband when talking, a sensible woman gives regards to their husband, you don’t tell him he’s talking nonsense. Dressings will not take you to heaven,  your husband is talking and you are proving your own point too, you lacks manner. 
Many women are too lazy to care for their husband, you have already bought a casket to bury your marriage, how can your husband wake up 4am in the morning to prepare for work and you call yourself a wife and you can’t wake up to cook for him? you will soon lose that husband of yours . with the help of God, I’ve being able to see many evil going around the world buka’s, many restaurants are highly demonic, but because of your laziness you pushed your husband there , then prepare t lose him very soon, many always tell their house maid to do everything including serving their husband foods, you as a wife, it’s wrong to tell your house maid to set the table for your husband, most of the house maid are demonic possessed, and they will snatch away your husband , you must not be too lazy to give your responsibility into the hand of your house maid
Many women can’t kneel for their husband and yet they can kneel for their pastor, I know of many women who called their husband by name, you have jezebel spirit and you want to dominate your husband, you need to repent else you will perish. Even if you are older than him, since he carries the title husband, you must respect and honor him according to the word of God, you must be ready to begged him and apologize when he’s angry with you, don’t say you are not at fault, he’s your head you know
If you are a woman who goes about discussing the matter in your home with your friends, then you should considered your marriage destroyed already, many foolish women discuss their home matter with their friends and colleagues at work. I’ve heard of a woman who even seek advice from his friend when to have sex with her husband, this woman deny her husband for sex for more than a year just because her friend ask her never to allow him except he decide to use condom, many women are as fool as this lady too, so I don’t know if you are the foolish woman I’m talking about, be ready to bury your own marriage. You don’t even discuss your marital home with your family not to talk of your friend

Another canker worm that destroys marriage is work. The bible said, what the Lord has joined together let no one put asunder, I’ve seen a family whereby the wife works in Lagos while the husband works in Abuja. Until today that is what destroys the marriage, you don’t separate from your husband or wife irrespective of anything that may be happening credit:  Ay Gbenga Elufidipe



  1. Hi Sarah, on the question of age differences? I dont think age should be a big factor in love btw two people. What matter is maturity, love, respect and understanding…there is nothing wrong for a woman to marry a younger man maybe like 1-5 years difference… Men marry 10 years difference and it is Ok as long as it is not something like 40 years difference…To me age does not guarantee that you will be forever rather the love of God, respect for each and understanding each other differences; Let Christ be the foundation of your relationship and you can overcome any challenges that comes along…Do not be unequally yoked..Never compromise


  2. Well Sarah thank you very much for your question. I believe the name dating has a negative connotation. Meaning if you are courting to be married you both must pray and abstain from every form of touching, kissing, hugging, perking or worst of all fornication. Keep your body and acceptable to God. I believe in platonic love. No long term dating becos that is how fornication begins

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Sarah

    Great post 👌👌. I love how you address every issue. I also attend RCCG 😁. That aside, I’d love to hear your thoughts about godly dating, the do’s and don’ts . Do you compromise? And how far is too far? The reasonable age difference etc. Presumably as a post?
    God bless you and have a great day 😃.

    Liked by 1 person

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